...or.....

1. You and the wife go to the grocery store, she asks you for the list. You fumble around in every pocket telling her "I know I have it here somewhere."

2. You take up cigar smoking even though you've never smoked a day in your life prior to Columbo.

3. You have an elaborate conversation with a friend for five minutes, you leave, then come back saying to him, 'JUST ONE MORE THING.....'

4. You tell peopple that your wife's car is nothing special, just for transporation.

5. You have trouble driving (I.E. almost side-swiping another car, running into garage walls, braking quickly to have the person behind you blow the horn as he passes you, etc...etc....)

And number one on the list:

1) Your life revolves around this forum.