It`s a vey sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife arer facing divorce and all anyone seems to do is make jokes about her false leg.

Personally,I think it`s prosthetic.

Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be distraught over the split."He has been my crutch for so long!"She said in an earlier briefing,"I have no idea why this has happened, I`m stumped"

She`s reported to be making frantic efforts to keep the split as civil as possible.
"She`s running around in circles",according to a close friend,"She will need all the support she can get,it`s not easy to walk out on a relationship like this"

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the marriage,Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the World amassing a colossal wealth due to his participation with The Beatles and subsequent musical collaborations,if an agreement hasn`t been signed it is believed that she won`t have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split have suggested that infedelity may have been the cause. "She`s terrible" a source stated,"always trying to get her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her alleged battle with alcoholism was the cause."Macca couldn`t handle it anymore" a friend said,"he would get home at night and find her legless".

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present that Paul got her for her Wedding,she`s heard he was getting her a plane.It all became clear when she opened her first present and it was a ladyshave,it was nopt the type of plane she was expecting.

Tam you are a LEGend...!!

Well I guess he's no getting his log over then!!!???

What do you call a horse with wings ?



Lindy McCartney.

(Wings the band)

Sorry.

Sorry to speak ill of the dead too.

Tam you're one sad mother but keep them comin'

Suppose you've heard the Lex McLean tale about the singed letter received from his uncle with the two wooden legs."The house went on fire I was burned to the ground. Worse still the police are charging me with arson and I hivnae got a leg to stand on"

I'm sure Derrick will be encouraging Baikie to sign Heather on a contract. Her cash injection would be useful in the absence of season ticket sales and she'd be able to get up and down the park quicker than some of teams recent signings. Only trouble is she's very one-footed.

NEWS FLASH::::::::::::::::::::
As part of the divorce deal between Heather and Paul McCartney, Heather is to recieve a plane.

Sources close to Heather assure us she will continue her close association with and will continue to use Immac on her other leg.
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